Every Person Has Their Own Story

Each person has their own story, their own thoughts behind their expressions, their own feelings, and a soul under their skin.

Each of us experiences many different moments and experiences throughout our lives and meets people who inevitably leave a mark on us. Even the circumstances and people we thought passed us unnoticed seem to return to our lives at some point later.

All of this affects our experiences and feelings either very intensely, or even completely unnoticed and without even noticing this happening; these experiences and people take us alternately to light and darkness, and to all shades in between.

We are only able to understand things from our own perspective, which in turn is shaped by our own life experiences. So how can we know what someone else’s perspective on things is? What do we know about their feelings?

Diving into the depths of our own minds and understanding ourselves alone is often complex enough; how in the world can we understand other people’s purposes and motivations? How can we know how another person is experiencing a particular situation?

We spend half of our lives trying to find out about other people and almost the other half judging their behavior, as if we don’t have enough of our own to think about.

Each person has their own story, and it’s good to show a certain kind of tact when dealing with some things. Situations that we think may be simple or easy to handle and in which we are able to express ourselves clearly may not be so easy for someone else.

“A shoe that fits one compresses the other; there is no recipe for life that applies to everyone. ”

-Carl Gustav Jung-

“If I were Mari, I would take things a little more relaxed…” “I don’t understand why Rami won’t leave his wife, I myself wouldn’t be able to endure such…” “I could never live like Kirsi…”

Maybe this person had a mother who didn’t accept him and said he was never good enough, and that’s why he became a perfectionist who constantly thinks he can do even better.

Or maybe this person used to be in a relationship with the person who was constantly criticizing him, and now he can’t see the situation as it really is.

Maybe this person would have needed attention and love but didn’t get them from their parents, so now he’s constantly looking for them elsewhere, or maybe he’s reluctant to accept the care and kindness of others. Each story has more than one side, and there is more than one answer to each question.

If we could settle into someone else’s position for a moment, we would act differently. However, we are no one else and we have not lived anyone else’s life. We know little of what we know about ourselves, and I say “little,” because sometimes we expect to react to things in a certain way, but when the situation strikes, our real reaction is completely different or we behave completely differently…

We should be able to look beyond the surface as well as the obvious and keep in mind that each person has their own story, their own background. Everyone has gone through certain experiences, feelings, encounters, each with their own biological and character traits that we need to take into account in order to better understand the situation as well as live from their perspective. Blind criticism leads nowhere.

We should also be aware of our tendency to criticize others. Only by listening to others and keeping in mind that their perspective is shaped by their story and emotions can we try to understand them. Sometimes, however, we are not able to fully understand others, and this in turn may be due to our own story and our own experiences.

So always remember that beneath every surface is a human, a strong but sensitive soul with its own wounds and scars – its own story.